meatloafs median post

[vitaanteacta]

Meatloaf's description of how medianhood feels to him.

medianhood to us feels kind of like how we see medicalized systems describe multiplicity, i guess

parts of a whole that have their own seperate identities and lives

we act like full individuals, we dont have a common thread that an outsider would notice, but we feel like we combine to make something a lot bigger than ourselves

a lot of us have real constricted emotional ranges, or were missing a stress response every human being has, or we cant do certain tasks that should really come free with being alive

we specialize and embody and it makes it hard to do anything else at all sometimes

if you were to tear one of us out of the system thered be a hole like you tore an organ out of our body

medianhood also feels like being one individual with parts, stacked together in a trenchcoat

we read a really old paper on multiple personality disorder that talked about how polyfragmented systems can be so multiple that their multiplicity conceals itself in all the rapid changes

i think thats what some of us have going on

if theres 100 plus little fragments in you and all of them can only do one thing and they all claim to be you when theyre asked

how the hell do you notice they were there in the first place?

how are outsiders supposed to help us figure it out when every one of those fragments are so invested in staying hidden?

theres this really stupid concept creationists like to talk about called irreducible complexity

where something is so complicated and so dependent on all its parts that the whole thing collapses like a house of cards if you take one out

this is bullshit when it comes to evolution for reasons i wont get into, im me, im not one of the smart guy types

but i think it works kinda ok as an explanation for our very seperate medianhood

we all have such complicated shit going on that is so intertwined with each other that trying to look at us as seperate individuals 100% of the time stops making sense

we were all always here because we have to be

without each other we could have never existed

the tons of fragments thing feels more like being an atom

for a really long time scientists thought you couldnt split the atom right? atoms were defined as something so small you couldnt break them apart anymore

so it was okay to treat them as if they are one whole thing

yeah it turns out thats not fucking true hahahahaha

we have nuclear power plants and bombs now to prove it

and then scientists looked at protons and neutrons and electrons and said "ok now these are indivisble, we know that 100 percent for sure"

"we can be done now and treat these as one whole thing"

well newsflash motherfuckers, new elementary particles dropped and we have quarks now

and we think that you cant split a quark but cmon how good of a track record does that line of thought have

but in most cases it turns out... treating an atom as an atom is ok actually

all those things make up an atom, and if you split them away from an atom it stops doing really interesting atom-y things

as you divide the indivisible individual you get smaller and smaller pieces that can be less and less complicated and do fewer and fewer things

you can look at the hundreds of tiny functions or you can look at the person and neither of those are wrong right

all thats changing is the zoom, and the level of complexity you wanna work at

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